No, I am not Grinch coming to steal your Christmas. I love it, somehow. OK, maybe LOVE is a very strong word, but nevertheless, I like it. Sometimes. Whaaat?! At least I am not like my friend who told me that “Christmas is the worst part of the year. It comes to you and it starts throwing s**t in your face: you don’t have a boyfriend yet, you have no idea what to do with your life, you’re poor, you’re going to gain weight with all this food. And since we have already learned how to be smart and how to pick up chicks, let me tell you 5 tips on how to survive Christmas and get clean out of it.
1. Basically, you don’t SURVIVE it. You should not struggle against it. You should go along with it. Fake it if you must.
2. Eat as much as you can. Soon enough, you’ll feel like a giant, walking, talking balloon and you will reject food as soon as you see it.
3. Listen to rock Christmas carols. Bon Jovi has some pretty good ones. And there are many others. They will save you all the jingles and the bad taste.
4. Make homemade presents. Really, there are a lot to choose from! Like, you can simply write Merry Christmas on a white paper and put it into a box along with some candy. After all, it’s the gesture that matters,and he who shall not be happy of your gift should walk through the valley of shadows and..OK, maybe I got a bit too far.
5. It’s 3 days, you won’t die if you get a bit merrier. Extra tip: hot wine with cinnamon helps 😉